Standing at the counter of the pizza place I work at. Lady storms in and slams a pizza down on the counter. "This isn't the f*****g pizza I ordered, what the hell are you going to do about?" She asked. I look at the pizza then at my buddy Nick and turn back to her and say, "Nothing". She then goes on a long rant telling how we are going to be fired, how stupid and incompetent we were, she actually told me I must be r******d, then asked why the hell we weren't going to do anything? I said "Because that pizza came from the pizza shop across the street." I think she actually managed to shrink in size and slink out looking so pathetic and beaten I almost felt bad for laughing till tears dripped down my face as she slunk off.

Working the window at Mcdonalds late night. Guy orders whatever and pulls up to the window. I'm cooking and handling the window, so I wasn't there when the customer pulled up. When I walked up to the window, I didn't see the f****r with trash in his lap. I open the window to take his card/cash and he throws a bag of trash at me. I take a step back, bothered that I just got trash thrown at me, and I watch his car speed off. I'm pissed, but there's nothing I can do. A couple seconds later I hear a small bang of metal on metal. I walk to the lobby and look out the windows. The douchebag slammed into a police cruiser who was about to loop around and use the drive thru himself. Of course I also went to tell the officer what just happened inside.

As a teenager I was working part time at a convenience store. I was being trained by the late night cashier. This dude comes in and grabs a bunch of cans of vegetables and such, and comes to the counter and stacks the cans in a very specific way, like a weird kind of pyramid on the counter. As the experienced cashier (my trainer) takes each can off the pyramid and rings it up, she reaches the end of the stack and we realize that the weirdo has his c**k out and has it laying on the counter behind the cans. Without saying a word, the trainer grabs one of the big heavy metal cans of beans and slams it down as hard as she can on the guy's d**k. He screamed an incredible scream of searing pain, grabbed his c**k, and ran out of the store. **She to me:** (calmly) "You get all kinds on the late shift."

Worked at Best Buy 10 or so years ago, this happened on Black Friday. Most of the customers were in bad moods since they'd been waiting hours to come in and stand in more lines. But this one lady was a raging b***h. After yelling at everyone in my department about how she NEEDED the laptop that was on sale despite it being sold out, she proceeds to tell us she'll have the store closed down because she "works with the city and knows the fire marshall and we have too many people in the store." So she calls him, we tell her to leave, and nothing happens to the store. However we called them as well to report what she'd said, and she got fired from her job for abuse of power.

Lady lays into me for the amount of the bill, called me every bad word in the english language. Says we overbilled her, she requested I go through her order. Come to find out we underbilled her by a $ 1000 dollars due to a misplaced zero. The silence on the other line was so beautiful.

More than a few decades ago I worked at Denny's. I had two male customers that decided to dine and dash. Got their license plate number and reported it to the cops and jokingly mentioned that they didn't even tip! Later that night they got pulled over for DUI, cops recognized license plate number from the report, brought them both back to the restaurant and forced them to pay the bill. After he was done paying, the cop just stood there and looked at them and said well? The guy sheepishly handed me my tip.

Worked at a telecom in Canada (I am no longer an employee thank god) Lady comes in with a broken iPhone is demanding to get a new one for free. If you don't know, in Canada the iPhone 6s is going for about $400 upfront on a two year contract at a minimum $80 plan. She had a good plan, but wanted it for free. She called up our loyalty team in store and spent the next two hours screaming at them. Finally, they agree to a deal, and she is getting it for zero. She looks at me and goes I do not want a case, and AppleCare is a scam. (We work on commission, so this essentially meant I was getting nothing and ruining my numbers). She keeps telling me to hurry up through the setup and I was trying to get them out of the store with everything transferred over and set up. She grabs the phone and starts marching off saying I was a terrible employee. She gets three steps out of the store and drops the phone. Shattered screen, and white screen of death. She ran back in asking what I can do. I shrug and went 'Sorry, but AppleCare sure would have helped eh?'

I worked for an online banking help desk and this 18yr old lad phoned up saying he had seen a transaction for £7 to allpay.net and because he didn't recognise it, he decided the bank were robbing him of £7 and that I was in on it and I was a "thieving little prick." Then he gets his dad on the phone who stuck up for his s**t of a son, saying I was a pathetic scumbag for stealing £7 off an 18yr old boy, even though it was a debit card transaction and I simply worked in the department which helped people use online banking. But anyway, I phoned our debit card services to see if they could give any more information, and boy could they. I then had the pleasure of relaying back to this little s**t's equally shitty father the following: "Hi sir, thanks for holding. I've checked with our debit card services team and I now understand why your son would not have recognised the payee 'allpay.net'. That's a deliberately vague term used for discretion when the customer has subscribed to online pornography. That's what it was for. Your son has been paying for online pornography. Would you like to pop him back on the phone so I can tell him it's a payment for his pornography, or will you pass on the information?" The father just muttered that the issue did not require any further investigation, thanked me for looking into it and hung up.

It was about three years ago. An employee, we'll call him Dave, was working at my retail store when two customers walk in at about the same time, one black, one white. Dave was being trained on register after being there for only a month or so with the manager standing behind him. The two customers get to the register at about the same time, but the black man beat him there. The black man then has the audacity to ask how good the product was before he bought it, and the white man behind him said,"Do I really have to wait for this f*****g n****r to be done?" The black man was unfazed, but Dave said "Sir, please don't use slurs like that or I am going to have to ask you to leave." White man: "Oh, big man? you going to make me leave, big man? Because I called this n****r a f*****g n****r?" Dave(6"5'): "Yes, I am a big man, and you have to leave now." White man: "F*****g fight me then, big man! I'll f*****g destroy you!" Dave: "Alright, I will. Let me clock out and grab my stuff and I'll meet you outside." The white man was a little surprised by the fact that he accepted. Dave turned to the manager and said, "Thank you so much for the opportunity, but I'm afraid I have to quit." Manager: "Dave, I get it, but you don't have to do this." Dave: "Yes I do." The white man was getting himself pumped up outside as Dave clocked out, grabbed his coat and his Pepsi, and walked outside where he sucker-punched the white man in the cheekbone, sprawling him out onto the curb. Dave drove off.

It couldn’t have been more obvious that a guy was trying to return stolen merchandise. He “lost” the receipt, didn’t know when it was purchased, paid with cash so we couldn’t just easily look up the transaction on a credit card... He said he would call his friend to ask if they knew when it was purchased, and then he took out his iPhone and without pressing a button started to talk on it. I was like...I can clearly see the home screen with no call happening. When he “got off the phone” I got a little bold and in my best retail manager voice said something to the effect of, “oh that’s cool! Is that a new update where you can talk to someone without actually calling them?” He left after that.

I worked in this fancy clothing store in this posh town at the seaside. It was a busy saturday when suddenly a very pretentious girl walked in with her boyfriend, ignoring us as we greated her and even giving my collegue a demeaning look. She went on to browse around in the store and eventually took some clothes with her in the changingbooth. After a while I notice a heated conversation arising from the booth between her and her boyfriend. I see the boyfriend running back and forth between the booth and some clothing racks, in the mean while me and my collegue where being chased away by her (she refused any help and didn't leave the booth) as if we were a couple of ebola patients. So me and my collegue continue working and helping other costumers. I was working the register when suddenly the girls turns up next to me, completely pissed off, and she starts ranting about "how our store/brand really should work on the fitting of our clothes and how we were complete f**k ups". I was completely caught of guard and right when I wanted to ask her what the exact problem was, I see my collegue looking at the girl while bursting out this horribly loud laugh, tears and all. What had happened was that the girl had taken with her a clothingpiece she thought was a strapless dress. Well, it wasn't a dress. It was a skirt. The girl had tried on all sizes and got completely fed up, yelling at us and her boyfriend because the FREAKIN "DRESS" WON'T FIT. So she walked out in a crowded store, making a scene, with a skirt pulled up to her tits. I have to admit, after she left I laughed till crying.